Being the first post about Gay Culture, I'd like to start with sharing my experiences and how being gay has effected my life as a whole. This post will be straight to the point and quite a quick post. The posts following this I will dive into the topics of marriage, adoption etc.. For now though here is my experience...
I came out just after my mum died, around the age of 15/16, one of my only regrets I have is not telling my mum I was gay but I'm sure she knew, well I hope anyway. Coming out was fairly easy for me, my school mates were fine, other people in my year had struggled with bullying but I managed to avoid that. I still was welcomed on the school football team, obviously there were a few jokes among the lads, but I took it as banter.
It seemed like everyone around me accepted the fact I was gay, except for my step-dad, he just couldn't accept it. We had very heated arguments, I was aloud previous girlfriends round but not boys and he wouldn't open up conversations about my sexuality. A few months after coming out, we had a heated argument on the phone where he told me he was going to come home and fight me. Before he had the chance, I packed my bags and moved to my friends. All the the age of 15/16. I felt like I couldn't live with the man who promised me so much when my mum died, but never lived through the promises.
The next year flew by, I moved back to Scotland with my dad. My dad was the one person I never thought would except I was gay but he was the opposite. He rang me one night asking me to tell him my secret, I laughed, and he just said I should have just told him and that he loved me for who I am. My dad has been in and out of jail, he's a big burly mans man and for him to say that to me, it gave me hope.
Things never worked out in Scotland, I moved back to Leeds within a few months and started life all over again. I was 17, in a big city, alone and didn't know where to turn. I met a boyfriend then, Kevin, a drag queen who worked on the gay scene, we raised a few eyebrows as I was 17 and he was 27 but, we lasted a couple of years.
Being with Kevin opened my eyes to the whole gay scene, the accepting nature, the warm family like feel and the seemingly happiness of everyone there. It wasn't till I turned 19 I realised the dark side. The seedy, drug filled, bitchy, nasty scene that I had been so oblivious to... But the friends I made there, some are like family, hence the title.
My drug problems started on the gay scene, but that's a whole other story! I met a partner in the gay club I worked for, I was with him for 3-4 years, we separated, but are still really close. Today, I'm single, feeling increasingly lonely, the place where I live doesn't have any gay bars, I haven't met any gay people and don't have any gay friends.
I have kept this short and straight to the point, missing out details as I want to post about the gay scene in more detail, about other issues I've come across as a gay man and obviously, as mentioned, the subject of marriage, adoption and more.
A.R. Wilson x
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